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Scousers cancel candlelit vigil for dead baby

A minutes silence at The Liberty Stadium (by request of Liverpool FC) tomorrow, has been cancelled along with a candlelit vigil and funeral precession around Anfield after the body of a tiny baby was found to be

……….a chicken foetus!

Officials from Liverpool FC had planned for their players to wear black armbands as a mark of respect and to provide themselves the opportunity to grieve for another 90 minutes before their woeful season finally draws to a close.

Flowers and cards were ‘laid’ at the scene yesterday while police attempted to ‘pluck’ all the details from egg-tremely distressed and grieving local residents who live ‘couped’ up around the shabby Anfield streets.

One resident, Mickey Whack, held back his tears to describe the moment the news ‘broke’. “arite der mace, err I chudent bleeeeev it like, it’s no ‘yolk’, I feeel reeeeally srry fe de muvver like, poor hen’

Police have issued a statement calling for calm on the estate and informed residents and newly formed support groups (of which there already dozens across the city) that they do not suspect any ‘fowl’ play!

Read the full story here via The BBC

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