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Opinion Piece

Rooney the Looney or misunderstood?

Wayne RooneyFor those of you who are not aware that I’m Canadian, let start off this article by stating that in my home country, like America our currency is based on the dollar. While one dollar in America is issued in bill form, Canada issues it’s dollar in coin form. We have even gone further by giving it a nickname, the “ Looney”. Looney of course also is slang for crazy or nuts in English therefore, I feel it’s apt and apropos to connect the “Looney” and it’s multiple meanings with one Wayne Rooney and his multiple personalities.

What can I add to the soap opera that has become Wayne Rooney other than my take on the man and how his motivations for doing what he does are rubbing my rhubarb the wrong way. The messages coming out of Old Trafford are mixed and confusing. In fact they don’t make an ounce of sense. One minute David Moyes states that “Wayne Rooney is not for sale”. Then he alters that statement slightly and proclaims that he “will not be sold this summer but could be off-loaded next year if he does not regain his best form”. Well Dave you either want him or you don’t. You can’t half want a player and then expect him to give your club his heart and 100% effort.

While trying to repair the damage caused by the angry fallout that Wayne had with the departing Sir Alex Ferguson, Moyes has tried to smooth over the frayed edges with comments like no one “is bigger than the club” and that Wayne will be on a twelve month probationary period to assess if he still has value to the club. ARE YOU BLEEPING KIDDING ME? If my employer made statements and demands like that regarding my position in the company I’d not only demand a release from my contract, I’d stick a hockey stick up his backside so high he could use the blade to floss his teeth.

Don’t get me wrong. I presently have no love for Rooney. I think he is a dim-witted idiot who is easily swayed and seduced by friends. He’s a simpleton who jumps at bright and shiny objects and who is easily manipulated by his agent and Twitter mates. He’s allowed himself to get fat and lazy and while he spent a mint to add 23 hairs to his receding scalp, he has done nothing to improve his diminishing skills and depressingly obvious poor attitude towards the club and manager that made him a star. Ask yourself one question. Would you fly to Greece and have a very expensive hair transplant and then shave your head? That boy isn’t playing with a full deck.

Now regarding his manager and mentor Sir Alex Ferguson. Fergie was not perfect. OK, he was close but he didn’t always treat star players right. His exit policy for aging players I felt was a bit harsh and showed a great lack of respect and appreciation for the effort those lads gave to the club he managed. Sparky Hughes, Dwight Yorke, Andy Cole, Roy Keane, David Beckham, Jaap Stam and Ruud van Nistelrooy are just the cream of the crop of players that were shown Old Trafford’s exit turnstiles when Fergie believed their expiry date had passed.

Ferguson rages at RooneyFor various reasons these players were shown no mercy and herded out of Dodge. Well it seems to me that just before the end of this past season Fergie felt it was time to say goodbye to a long career but as he was departing his plan was to take the moody malcontent Wayne Rooney with him. Lets face it, Fergie could see as clear as day that Rooney no longer showed the hunger or desire and that his focus was elsewhere. Add to that some inconsistent passing and finishing as well as a decreasing first touch and it was obvious that now was the time to unload the player before he became relatively worthless in the transfer market.

Oh sure Wayne being the Looney that he is may have gone off in Fergie’s office or on the training pitch and he may have claimed he wanted to go, but I firmly believe that had Fergie not retired, Wayne would be already gone. Fergie hated disrespect but above all, he loathed disloyalty. Over the years he kept many a player a lot longer than he should have due to their devotion, loyalty and ability to be team guys and keep their pie holes shut. Paul Scholes and Ryan Giggs were quintessential Fergie boys. They did as he said with no questions asked. Both lasted more years than they should have or would have elsewhere. Players like Anderson, Evans and Nani under perform but remain with the club simply because they keep their mouths shut and put the team first. And what about players like Ole Gunnar Solksjaer and Darren Fletcher who lost so much time due to injury or illness? Fergie stuck by Ole until the lad was forced to retire and he stuck by Fletch to the end. That’s a manager’s devotion for good and loyal service.

Wayne Rooney however, is another breed. He is of the greedy, Looney wanker variety who spends to much time at parties, nightclubs smoking cigarettes, flirting and God knows what else, while also having time to go on Twitter comparing stats with his buddies on England and other clubs around Europe. For him all that matters is having his cake and eating it too. He wants all the trophies but he also wants to be top dog, starting every game and getting the ball in the box enough times to score many goals. He clearly was fed up with the lack of service, being moved around and losing his striker position to the better and more team oriented Robin van Persie. Wayne, shame on you mate. You have me showing love and praising a former Gooner instead of you.

The bottom line is Wayne wanted United to spend lots of money on players, just not strikers. He wanted Fergie to do whatever it takes to win, just make sure you don’t move him around and you are sure to right him as striker in the starting sheet every game. A couple of years ago the same soap opera occurred but back then good old greed and the good old dollar (Looney) shut him up. Now I do not believe the problem is money. Greed is still the issue but it’s not monetary. It’s about playing time and team focus.

To be completely honest, I actually felt for Wayne two years ago. His reason for wanting out back then was his reluctance to stay with the club if they were not going to be serious about buying more high priced talent. I can relate to that and at the time I agreed with him. However unlike me, Wayne the Looney often gets teased and gets jealous of his Barcelona buddies and his good chums at Chelsea who always blow him sweet kisses and tell him how great their lives and respective clubs are. Is it possible for clubs to use players to tap up players? You bet it is because Barcelona, Real Madrid and Chelsea have used their players and those tactics through the media and Twitter to get into Wayne’s head but good.

It’s hard for a manager like Fergie to compete with other clubs for one of his own player’s affections and loyalty when those other clubs are sabotaging him by poisoning the player’s mind. Two years ago Ronaldo was used to convince Rooney that life in Madrid was wonderful. Lampard and Ashley Cole always say they would love their buddy Wayne to wear Chelsea blue and Barcelona are presently using their new signing Neymar to coax Rooney to jump ship for Catalan country. It’s all just so sleazy and off-putting.

I want Wayne Rooney gone from Manchester United. For years he was one of my favourite players and I personally used to refer to him as the Electric Roonaroo. Now I refer to him as the Pathetic Lonneytoon. I am sick of the sight of him. Fat ugly, big eared Shreck. Be gone you moody, selfish clown. The final straw for me was the look of disinterest and disrespect he showed Fergie when he walked up to the Champions podium after the last game of the season. As a fan, I always had issues with Fergie but had that been me, I’d have given the man a giant bear hug and big wet Greek kiss while thanking him. But not Wayne nope, Rooney just stuck out a wet clammy hand and half heartedly offered limp wrist handshake and probably whispered good riddance to Fergie under his breath.

And now finally to you David Moyes I say, make your first months at Old Trafford memorable by showing us all that you are a proactive, no nonsense manager that does not tolerate selfish and counterproductive displays and disloyalty. Keeping Wayne Rooney is the last thing you should do. He has become a cancer like the Glazers. He will eat away at the insides of the club by disrupting team unity and harmony. His selfish desires will manifest themselves in the dressing room and on the pitch and you want to keep him until he gets fatter, older and his value drops even further? Moyes has been working hard to fix the rift caused between Rooney and Fergie but personally, that effort should be going to the improvement of the rest of the team and trying to buy more quality players. Unload this malodorous rump and let us all feel relief. We are all United supporters and we demand loyalty from one another as well as from the players we support on Manchester United. I for one do not want a player on my team who would prefer to be elsewhere.

To Wayne Rooney I say….don’t let the door hit you on the way out.


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