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Ron Writes off Chelsea | Drog Rubbishes Himself | Pique Is Patient | And A Slow Day

Boring day, I am sure, it’s going to be. So is the news. Slow as it could be. I even took a break yesterday from posting anything relevant. But again, I don’t think much was missed by the absence of the daily mandatory post of yesterday.

Anyway, we have to soldier on. I will probably get some posts out discussing about players and other things in the next few days, so we’ll have useful things to talk about. We could also talk about international football, but I wouldn’t be too arsed to have that discussed on this blog. Although, if someone is interested to write a bit on how our lads fared in the international games, be my guest. Of course, I’d expect a certain standard of writing that isn’t necessarily Shakespearean (who writes that kind of stuff these days anyway), but at least conforms to the basic framework of the English language. So there.

Moving on, let’s see what we can talk about today.

Cristiano Ronaldo thinks a Mourinho-less Chelsea has as much chance of winning the title as Rooney has of going a game without mouthing off obscenities. Well, those weren’t his exact words, but he did say that a Chelsea without Mourinho does not have too much of a chance at the title. Fair assessment, I would say. Although, they still have enough quality to finish in the top four if they get their act together.

Meanwhile, Didier Drogba has used his immaculate analytical skills and principles of mathematical induction to say that Ronaldo will not quite match up to his amazing goal scoring record of last season. His reasoning might have been highly complex to understand but he was gracious enough to simplify things to allow us imbeciles understand why he came to said conclusion about Ronaldo.

I do not believe Cristiano Ronaldo has the rhythm to follow up last season’s achievements. He is not a machine.

Quite. He isn’t a machine. Which could, of course, mean either of two things. One, he himself, having scored a hatful of goals for Chelsea last season, wouldn’t be able to replicate his success for them this time round — as he might not be a machine — which is bad news for Chelsea. Or, two, he might be able to score tons of goals this season too, which would make him a machine. Hmm… are there rules that allow machines to play for clubs?

But, of course, the usage of the word machine might have been a rather cryptic metaphor that doesn’t quite appeal to our mental faculty. Didn’t we just say we were imbeciles? Oh well.

Like all slow days, there is the stray conspiracy theory. The latest one being a gem from the Daily Mail (will not link to this one) that said Anderson’s excellent performance came at the back of some harsh words from senior players warning Anderson to buck up or else risk ‘jeopardising his career’. Hmm… I wonder if even Djemba-Djemba was told how crap he was. (In hind-sight, it might have been a good idea — to tell Djemba-Djemba, that is.)

The Sun also links us to another striker, Jeremy Menez, from Monaco whose play-making skill is, however, compared to Zidane. I am sure many of you might be quick enough to point out that the next Zidane was Samir Nasri. But again I’ve heard the same about Yohann Gourcuff and Franck Ribery. We’ll only have to wait a while for the next-next-real-ultimate Zidane. Now that it’s taken us quite sometime to conclude, after much argument and truckloads of candidates, that Messi is the next Maradona.

On to some actual news, Pique is willing to be patient for his chances this season. The kid’s a great talent and he must be given more time. He is also versatile as he can play across the back four. That should help him greatly. While on the subject of youngsters making it big, Eric Harrison, the coach behind the class of ’92, reckons Simpson has what it takes to challenge skipper Neville at right back. That’s good to know. He did play well, although it came against Wigan — who were a Premiership side after all — so it should be interesting to see if he would be able to, first, push Brown for a starting berth at right back.

And finally good news for us, bad news for England, as Brown rules himself out of the England squad with a knee injury. We hope the time could be used by him to get fit for the Villa game.

And that should be it for the day. Will be back tomorrow, hopefully, with more updates.